Am I Really in Control?

It seems I am rarely called to write blog posts of late. One reason is that I've been very busy but beyond that it's that I don't really know what to write about. Sometimes it seems to me it's all been said and what is so important about what I have to say anyway? Is it to hear myself talk (or see my written word)? I'm simply not that fascinated with what I have to say much of the time and those moments of powerful insight seem to gently blend into the fabric of my being without the need to be expressed in writing most of the time.

Life is now and always has been unfolding in ways that are so beyond personal control or power that it seems a bit ridiculous to try to capture it in any way. It is simply flowing, the out-breath and in-breath of Life itself having an adventure that is being witnessed by what I call me.

Reminds me of a conversation I had with a friend this morning about what was going on in our lives which came down to how helpless we really are in so many ways. The suffering and pain we see all around us is so beyond our abilities to do anything about that it often sends us into all kinds of coping behaviour in an attempt to deal with the fact that we really cannot do anything about it.

It's all part of this great unfolding as is the realization that the best I can do sometimes is make peace with the helplessness and let the healing that is then available happen. When I think I have to fix you it really means I'm trying to fix myself which only reinforces the idea that there's something wrong with me (and you). This is the human condition; it is neither right nor wrong, it is the journey.

Namaste

Beyond Survival

You know what it's like when you behave in a way that you aren't really proud of?

There are a variety of ways we tend to deal with this kind of behaviour but my favourite seems to be to defend myself, if not outwardly at least in my own little mind. One thing I notice however is that when I am busy defending my less than stellar behaviour I am not tending to something that is far more important than any image I may be trying to protect; that which is afraid or hurting or ashamed within me.

That's the problem with all defensive or offensive or distracting behaviour when we get uncomfortable, it does not address the real problem in any way. We may feel justified or superior or more powerful (at least a little less helpless) but if you look closely you'll find there's still something hidden in the darkness somewhere deep in our hearts that is being ignored, again. There is still someone deep inside that needs attention and all we've accomplished with our usual behaviour is to make it wrong or bad or simply unwanted which is what started the whole cycle of survival based behaviours in the first place.

When you take the time to feel into what is laying just below the behaviour you will usually find an innocent being who decided a long time ago there must be something wrong with it and so devised all kinds of strategies to cope. Those strategies served us in our struggles to survive confusing and painful situations but they really stopped serving us when our journey turned toward authenticity and true well-being.

One of the problems we encounter as we shift to authenticity over survival is that our patterns are so strongly ingrained and we are so accustom to the thoughts that we don't even realize what is now actually causing our pain; our own perceptions. If we never question the way we think and behave we never get beyond basic survival coping.

So if authenticity, inner harmony and well-being are what you are looking for try looking into what is behind the disharmony. You don't have to stay in survival, there is so much more available when you include even that which you have rejected about yourself. Then when the old patterns show up they don't have to rule your life, they become portals into a whole new world of beauty and wonder.

Namaste